The Dinner is Done and So Am I

Recently, my husband returned home from a long day at work in the evening to find three place settings at the table instead of the usual four, two screaming children, one severely burned pan, a home that looked like a natural disaster site and a frazzled wife.

Instead of being met with the customary hug and kiss, I informed him dinner was done and so was I. Without even looking up, I grabbed the car keys and announced I was going out-somewhere, anywhere but here! As I made my way through the laundry room, I heard him exclaim, “Take your time-for the sake of the rest of us!”

As I backed out of the driveway, I knew just the place to go. I headed to Friday’s with a stack of old magazines that I never seem to have time to read, my reading glasses, a craving for a turkey burger and Mojito and someone to wait on me!

When I arrived, I explained that I was a runaway “Mom” and that I needed a quiet booth away from the crowd. So, alone in my solitary booth I savored every bite of my burger, every sip of my drink and learned all about important and not so important issues going on outside my homestead! It was a great dinner…

On the way home, I called my Mother to vent with tears streaming down my cheeks. After a few dozen more,, “You’ll be okay…” reassurances from my Mother while parked in the driveway, I walked back in…My husband, a smart and kind man, took my hand and led me into our bathroom where he had a warm bath and candles waiting. The frustration seemed to melt away as I soaked and soaked. Someone in my house did something for me – and I felt loved and appreciated. It was just what I needed.

Motherhood is so joyful, so exciting but also so very demanding. As a Mom, you are on 24/7, 365 days a year with no sick leave or vacation! It is all about giving and placing your family and others first –with often no time or energy left for you. And when the “giving” tank reaches empty, there is absolutely nothing left. So, how do I fill my tank?


Once a year, I frequent a local hotel/spa for a 24 hour get away! Armed with books and magazines, my favorite bath oils, chocolate and a desire for “all about me” time, I go –alone. I indulge in a massage, lots of sleeping time and am happy to frequent the restaurant that is right there! My husband often says that this is a wise investment because I return so rested, relaxed and much happier and more giving when I return!

I must say too that I really enjoy eating an occasional breakfast, lunch or dinner alone! During my career travels, I became accustomed to dining alone and learned to treasure those uninterrupted moments of peace. So, now in the midst of Motherhood, I enjoy having a meal without looking for lost shoes or children under the table, those endless trips to the restrooms and refereeing yet another argument. During these meals, I love to read, observe others and just to have a moment to think, plan or dream.

One of my other favorites is to relax, nap or read by the YMCA pool-all while the girls are in childcare! My friends know where to find me after a workout!

I love my family. I love my friends. And I have learned that to be the loving, caring, kind, humorous, committed and loyal wife, Mother and friend that I need to be-I have to love me. And sometimes that means filling my tank by simply just being alone.

So, make an effort to fill your own tank this month! Push aside the chaos, chatter and clutter – and take time to recharge, regroup and revive your own soul…quietly. You and your own family will be glad you did!